Thursday, March 6, 2014

How to be a hoodlum (for suburban rich kids) - Part 1 - The Enprankening

     Awesome, safe prank idea.  Feel free to use this one at the office or school when you need a personal day but your criminally small amount of PTO has been used up.*

     Step One: Get three miniature pigs.  You know, the special ones that are the size of terriers.  I mean, piglets would work, as would almost any other uncommon animal like roosters or monkeys, but miniature pigs (complete with diapers) would be funniest.  But all three animals must be the same or similar.  For the rest of this, Ima call them pigs.

     Step Two: Get some nontoxic paint in a bright color that contrasts well with the fur/skin/hide of your animals.  Nontoxic because we don't want to hurt the wee li'l bairns, now do we?

     Step Three: Paint the pigs with the numbers 1, 2, and 4.

     Step Four: Release the little buggers inside the building at night before the day of the prank.  Don't get caught, and make sure they have food to eat.

     The next day whoever opens the building will find the three pigs and the havoc they caused.  Chaos will ensue, but the prank isnt over yet.  The true master stroke of enjoyment will be watching them search for pig number 3 all day, getting more and more worried.

     Enjoy!  Until tomorrow, lovelies.

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     *(obviously there are risks involved and I take no responsibility if you manage to get in trouble for this.  The preceding was an artistic work of fiction and should not have been taken as an actual suggestion.  Remember, keep all pranking safe and lighthearted.  Wheatons Law** is, most definately, in effect here.)

     **(Wheatons Law - "Don't be a dick." - First coined in a weekly video from the Canadian sketch comedy troupe, Loading Ready Run, in the mid 2000s, and popularized during the Desert Bus for Hope marathon.  Wheatons Law is now primarily used in conjunction with chat rooms for online streaming such as Twitch.tv.)

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