Incandescent RAGE!

     GoddamnsunofabitchingfuckerstompingWHORE!

     *Ahem*

     I found a bunch of my old Nintendo GameCube games and decided to get some use out of my Wii (which has been a Netflix machine in my daughters room for over a year now).  I moved the wii into the living room and have been having fun playing through Zelda: Ocarina of Time (which I never finished) and Mario Kart: Double Dash.

     FUCKING DOUBLE DASH CAN EAT A BAG OF WET FLOPPY KANGAROO DICKS!

     Some of you may have heard of the term "Rubberbanding A.I.".  There is even an entire page devoted to this on www.tvtropes.com called "The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard".  Basically it's when, in a video game, if you are doing well, the computer opponents will suddenly become much more difficult.  More than just Getting harder as the game goes on, in Mario kart this can happen within the frame of a single race.

     At the higher speed settings, the computer A.I starts off as a moderate challenge.  But, if you pull more than a bit ahead watch it!  Suddenly the computer is driving faster than the top speeds in the game, able to pull off miracle deflection shots with items, gets the best items like blue shells and lightening bolts (when they are in the top 3, where, as a player, you are only allowed those items if you are in LAST place and nowhere else), teams up with other drivers to target your kart to the exclusion of the rest of the field (even if they are AHEAD of you), and even the lighter enemies can suddenly knock you off the course.

     I think the term "Controller-Snappingly Frustrating" applies here.

     I'm sick of this shit.  I'm done.

     I'm gonna go read a book.