'Greentext Story'

     Short one today, peeps.  As some of you may know, I sometimes peruse imageboards.  If you don't know what I'm talking about then good.  The board I usually lurk on can be rightfully described thusly:

     "You will never find a more wretched hive of scum, and villainy."

     Wretched hive that it is, I still find that I can be freely creative in a completely anonymous environment.  It was in this type of anonymous board that I wrote the following.  (based on a story told to me by a close friend)

     ***AUTHORS NOTE***   What follows is an artistic work of FICTION.  Only a fool would take anything after this disclaimer as fact.

 - - - - -

>be me

>19, college, frat party

>girl and I have both had a few drinks

>she's 'in the mood' and wants to go back to my place.

>heckyeah.jpg

>call a cab, I'm not getting a DUI for random frat party sex.

>cab ride home she's all over me, hand in my pants, telling me,out loud, what she wants to do to me, the good stuff.

>get home, have some awesome sexy times.

>wake up next morning and girl is gone.

>oh well, coolstorybro mode engaged.

>in class two days later she walks in with two campus cops, points at me, and I get hauled out in handcuffs.

>long story short she had a boyfriend, he dumped her for being a whore, now she's crying rape to convince him to take her back.

>Imwellandtrulyscrewed.iso

>sitting in a holding cell, use my only phone call to call my frat bros

>they go into Sherlock Holmes Mode

>three hours later they have the cabbie who drove us home at the police station.

>cabbie shows the cops his in cab security footage, apparently he keeps a camera in his cab after being robbed a few times.

>cops hold me for another hour while they call her in

>they show her the video, she loses her mind!  Screaming at the cops about how they are going to ruin her life and some such.

>she swings at a big male officer

>she got maced, tasered, brought up on false police report and assault charges, and later expelled.

>cops let me out and tell me whole story, show me the interview tape of her freak out.

>laugh all the way home with my bros

Moral of the story?

Men:  Check to see if she has a boyfriend BEFORE you take her home!

Women:  It is not okay to cry 'Rape' after consensual sex just because you regret the act.

 - - - - -

     Like I said, a wretched hive of scum and villainy.  I'm only reposting this because it's relatively tame and I want to see if this type of humor blends with the real world and my style.  

     Let me know what you think.  Until tomorrow, lovelies!